I'm sure that many people who I ever talked to about my dream of becoming a boudoir photographer raised their eye brows and thought: "Why boudoir photography? And what is it anyway?" Well, I've never been married, had babies or been pregnant so the options of becoming a wedding-, family- or baby photographer were very slim. I've never been the popular girl in high school either but always dreamt of beautiful things, always wanted to look like the girls in the magazines which I guess helped me grow passion for boudoir.
For those who don't know me or haven't know me long enough; here's a little snippet of what I thought will make me look cool at age 15:
The picture says it all - I think we can all agree on that without going into too much detail on why my "style" is all kinds of wrong and how ridiculous I look on this photo. And while my parents constantly "lied to me" saying how beautiful I was, deep down I always knew I will never be as popular as my friends who all had better taste in fashion than me, all were prettier than me and had boys running after them. Well, at least I got to hang out with the beautiful ones which is still better than being part of the nerd's gang. :) Hated those glasses. I remember going to my very first date and after my friend did my makeup we agreed it's best if I wasn't wearing glasses. I hardly saw a thing but the guy never showed up so it didn't matter at the end. (Bastard!)
At age 16 or 17 I finally got rid of those terrible glasses and my Mum got me contact lenses! Did the World just became a better place?! It definitely did for me however I still had a long way to go before my style was acceptable. Nonetheless, wearing contacts were a step forward feeling a bit better about my looks and I was still imagining being as pretty one day as those girls in the magazines...
Fast forward the story line; I'm not 17 anymore, a few years older now, but that girl who used to wear glasses, who was never feeling like she's one of the pretty ones is still there deep inside. I don't think it will ever change completely, but by now I've learnt to believe that we are all unique and that looking beautiful isn't just what's visible on the facade.
For a while I've been thinking of getting a boudoir shoot done but it seemed too hard, too expensive and too much of a hassle - especially that the photographers I've dreamt to do it with are in San Diego, California and I'm in Sydney. Then I booked my flights to Las Vegas to attend to WPPI 2013 which is one of the biggest photography conventions in the World. This is where the above mentioned boudoir photographers usually have a stand, speak and overall share the love for boudoir. This year was different because they offered a few boudoir shoots for photographers who'd like to experience how it is to be on the other side of the lens. I think that was the moment when I stopped thinking about the $$, I knew I will do whatever it takes to book this shoot because this time I couldn't find an excuse why not to do it once we'll all be in Vegas at the same time. The excitement of the preparation was just what I needed as at the time I was going through heartbreak (which at least helped me lose a few kilos and get into shape for the big day). :) From the moment of booking my spot it was great process of communication between The Boudoir Divas and the other girls who had a shoot too; we could share ideas, inspire each other and get ready for the day.
I know it will sound over-the-top, but I will say it anyway: words can't describe what an amazing experience it was from the moment of buying my first piece of outfit to getting my glass of champagne in my hand in the hotel suite before getting my hair and makeup done by the fabulous Peggy Rogers, then being photographed by The Boudoir Divas. This was the day I felt like I AM one of the girls in the magazine who I was so envious of at age 16. Being told by Marissa, Kimberlee and Peggy how good I look was so surreal yet I've never felt so beautiful in my life! Thank you ladies! :)
That feeling will stay with me forever just like the photographs to remind me that yes: I am beautiful. And no, I don't need to look the same as my pretty girlfriends or the models in the magazines. I just need to be me. Confident, the girl who I truly am.
This is my story what made me believe that EVERY WOMEN should shine their beautiful! :)
